Bonnicle on Ice

As many Americans are aware, we are under attack. The "Canadians" are under the false pretense that they are better hockey players than us AMERICANS. Let me make one thing perfectly clear... Had we known it was going to be this close of a game, we would have unleashed our real team, with our star player - BonGretzky.

Us Americans didn't think that we would have to pull this out on the inferior Canadians so soon, but get ready Sochi 2014, because BonGretzky is coming! She's a one man team that leaves the net open at all times of the game. No need for a goalkeeper, sorry ryan miller. But BonGretzky has no use for you anymore, just like the jazz and Ronnie Brewer. R.I.P....

In four years when you need your hockey fix again, look no further than on our own American soil, for BonGretzky will be bringing home 3 Golds. Wait, 3? YOU HEARD RIGHT! Two in men's and women's hockey, and one in Ice Sculpture Gardening.

Boncerely,

BonDipLuvr_108